Gameplay video of Sonic Frontiers makes you go fast… asleep

Sonic Frontiers, it’s Sega’s umpteenth attempt to re-energize the prickly blue speedster. With Sega’s expectations being higher than Snoop Dogg on a regular Sunday, I was expecting to see some invigorating gameplay at some point. Well… we got gameplay alright. Thanks to IGN, we got 7 whole minutes of it. Plenty for you to fall asleep on.

Because honestly – and let me break it to you gently – this is the most boring gameplay video I’ve seen in ages. It looks decent, that’s a plus, but man… where’s the damn action? If you’re dropping Sonic in a Breath of the Wild-lookin’ open-world setting, don’t forget to add stuff to that world. And by adding stuff I don’t mean scalable, grindable, levitating objects with rings on ’em. I mean, for an unknown planet, it sure seems to be catering to our cyan spiked one.

But hey, maybe it’s just me. You might get mighty excited. If moonwalking toward a couple of rings and solving rudimentary puzzles gets you off, by all means. Sonic Frontiers might be your GOTY. Press play and get your rocks off. Personally, I’d rather waste my time watching someone build the Sonic Lego set instead, but don’t let me stop you from getting your Sonic fix.

Of course, there’s a fair chance that this is just a vid created to show off the size of the map. But Sega, really, if you’re going out – boasting Sonic Frontiers – and demanding a game that’ll put Sonic back on the map, you gotta do better than this. These showcases don’t get you the high review scores you so desperately seek.

Ahhh… maybe that’s why EA and Ubisoft aren’t hosting E3-like showcases this summer. Now I get it!